Meeting “Igby”: Xavi’s Birth Story

“…I was at 9.5 cm, and then she asks me if I wanted epidural, I said yes but I knew that was a trick question.”

Igby is the bump name/ fetus name (or whatever you call it) Marco gave our little boy. I don’t know why but he likes giving them weird, unconventional, unattractive names (Cassie’s was Spriki short for Sprikitik), I love him so I just roll with it and besides it’s only temporary until the baby comes out.

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Proud daddy Marco

With the successive change in our lives, I wasn’t surprised how different the two pregnancies were. This time around I found myself in Muncie, Indiana, blessed to have insurance coverage through Marco’s work (although we still have the deductible and of course eventually our share to pay) so at least we didn’t have to worry about that, an OBGYN referred by Marco’s physician uncle and a hospital close to home a.k.a Marco’s workplace. Another thing that I had to deal with was not having my family around, it’s a good thing my sister Pauline from Houston stayed after the holidays to help me during the last stage of my pregnancy.

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Cassie reading to her baby brother.

I had my last doctor’s appointment a week prior to giving birth and from the looks of it we could all tell that the baby dropped already but I was only 1.5 cm dilated and it stayed like that for a few more days. Fast forward to the day of the pregnancy, I was already feeling some pain in the morning but I still equated it to Braxton Hicks so I went along my merry way doing the usual cleaning the house. Yes, at this point I was still bending down and climbing on chairs (don’t worry they weren’t really high) even though my doctor and Marco already told me off. Pauline offered to help me out, she always does but I like being on the go, so I still bathed Cassie, cleaned her room, fixed our bed and even vacuumed the house. I was feeling pain all throughout the day but nothing I couldn’t handle, I was still convinced it was Braxton Hicks. Marco came home from work around 5pm, I already texted him earlier that I was feeling some pain but they weren’t consistent yet, he was pretty sure I wasn’t in labor yet so as soon as he got home, he changed and headed out to dinner. He was scheduled to take out the residency program applicants for a pre-interview dinner and it just so happened that his cousin was one of those applicants so I told him to go.

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Always the first one to change the baby’s diaper.

He left at 6pm and around 7pm I felt the contractions more consistent this time so I started timing it. They were still approximately every 7-8 minutes and they lasted for 25-30 seconds so I was thinking maybe I’ll end up giving birth early tomorrow. Nope. The contractions got stronger and so my sister texted Marco about it, he got home around 8pm and timed the contractions himself, they were every 4 minutes and they lasted for 40 seconds, I was in labor and we needed to head to the hospital ASAP. Every STOP sign was a pain in the a**, I literally asked him if he could break the law and not stop just coz it hurt every time he would. We got to the hospital around 8:30pm, Pauline dropped me, Marco and Cassie at the entrance as she parked the car and he wheeled me into the Labor and Delivery section. I was in pain alright, I’d make a face every time the contraction came but still managed to take an IG video/ snap while heading there.

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Cassie touching her brother’s head for the first time.

I walked in and they asked me the standard questions,I even managed to reach for my wallet and handed my insurance card (only to find out that I handed my car insurance card, hahaha). Name, Doctor, how far along, due date…I verbally answered them in between contractions while Marco filled up the remaining forms to fill. Finally, they had a nurse check to see how dilated my cervix was—I was at 9.5 cm, and then she asks me if I wanted epidural, I said yes but I knew that was a trick question.

They wheeled me into a room and had a LOT of nurses and that’s when I realized, “oh crap, the baby is probably going to come out any minute coz they’re all scurrying around like its an emergency”. My doctor walked in and she explained to me that it will take time for epidural to kick in and the baby will come out before it does so here we go— ALL NATURAL NO EPIDURAL BIRTH and I wasn’t ready. Oh well, C’est La Vie. They broke my water (which probably was the only thing that was stopping the baby from coming out) She told me to let her know when I start to feel the urge to push and I’m telling you in between the contractions you suddenly get that urge to let the baby out. My husband who was holding my hand had to ask me to let go mid-way coz I was crushing it, I guess you don’t really know your own strength until you push a baby out.

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I don’t know how I did it but I focused on my doctor’s voice and importantly followed her directions, when she tells you to push, no matter how  tired you are you give it your all and you PUSH. They were giving me updates like, “his head is coming out”, “oh, he has a lot of hair”, “you’re almost there”, you listen to those words and let it motivate you. Just when I thought I couldn’t push anymore coz I really felt exhausted, I gave it one LAST.LONG.PUSH to the point where I couldn’t breathe and then I heard it—I heard my baby’s cries, I finally get to hold my little Xavi They cleaned me up as they were cleaning him up, I felt them taking out something that felt like a big blob and then they stitched me down there. I think what I hated the most was when they pushed my tummy to check if blood was still coming out from wherever its supposed to come out (I’m pretty sure theres a medical term for that) but if you ask me what the whole process felt like, it felt like I released one BIG, GINORMOUS poop after a month of being constipated (sorry for being grossly graphic).

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At 10:03 pm, I gave birth to Jose Inigo Xavier. He weighed 7 lbs 13 oz and was 21 inches long. Thank you Lord for keeping me and Xavi safe.

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Our first family photo
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Taking him home for the first time. It was one cold night

 

~Rhea (now officially a mom of 2)

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The Thing with Xavi

From his gender, to me not getting an epidural while giving birth, to having a newborn photoshoot done, to loud whiny cries—everything has been unexpected with this little guy.

We weren’t going to do a newborn photoshoot for Xavi, a lot has been going on and I didn’t even bother doing my research for local photographers just because our schedule (or Marco’s, rather) hasn’t been that flexible and that would definitely be an additional expense so I didn’t dwell on it.

In an unexpected turn of events, we ended up doing one for him and we were blessed enough to work with a very nice local photographer. Amanda Hakes of Betty and Bobby Photography was very professional and she handled Xavi wonderfully, she was very pleasant to work with and was very patient with him. When he wouldn’t cooperate anymore, she waited while I fed him until he was satisfied and there was no pressure in my part at all. Here are some photos of her beautiful work.

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 This boy looks like an angel when he’s asleep but he can cry LOUDLY when he’s hungry

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She got promoted to BIG SISTER

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I already know he’s going to be a Mama’s boy

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Of course daddy is the happiest, he has another player on his team

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With our little, handsome newborn

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I know you’re an Ate now but you will always be mommy’s baby

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Our latest family photo— Daddy Marco, Mommy Rhea, Ate/ Manang Cassie and Xavi.

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I decided to share these photos today as Xavi turns three weeks. He had his 2-week appointment a few days ago and we were a bit worried that he wouldn’t gain his birth weight back because we had that problem with Cassie. From 7 lbs. and 13 oz Xavi’s weight went down to 6 lbs and 11 oz on his first doctor’s visit and we’re happy to say that he gained his birth weight back and more, he’s currently 8 lbs and 11 oz. My little man feeds a lot, I don’t remember breast feeding Cassie this much but when he asks, mommy gives and believe me he asks a LOT.

Post partum recovery for me is a lot better this time around in both emotional and physical aspect. I’m more mobile and at three weeks I’m doing chores like I didn’t even give birth and I find that pretty amazing considering that I didn’t have an epidural during labor. I’ve lost 20 lbs. since giving birth and I need to lose 15-20 lbs more, so far so good. Cassie has adjusted pretty well with the presence of her little brother, of course she acted up the first few days when we brought him home but recently she’s asked to take part in taking care of him, throwing his dirty diapers and putting lotion on him. Hopefully in the next few weeks, we can fully adjust with the new baby in the house and establish a new norm for our growing family.

~Rhea

DIY Winter Maternity Shoot: 37 Weeks

Being pregnant can toy with your emotions and affect your self confidence especially when you’re used to being small most of your life. It’s like one day you wake up and look at the mirror and there it is…that big bump and that large behind. Based on my first pregnancy I already knew that I wasn’t one of those women who carry their babies small, it’s always my behind and my belly that go first; the arms, the face and the rest of me follow.

At 37 weeks I knew I didn’t want my pictures taken because I was scared to see a planet in the photos plus its been snowing here in Indiana and all I wanted to do was stay warm indoors but my sister Pauline convinced me to do them, nothing fancy just some DIY project that we both could work on. And it just so happened that it was her birthday that day and she suggested that we could do my pregnancy photos, how could you say “No” to the birthday girl, right? So I took out my brand new portable makeup train case with the light-up mirror that Marco gave me for Christmas and had Pauline do my makeup.

I didn’t have anything to wear since this was an impromptu thing but having a theater background assured me that I could scrounge up some things I could use for the photos. I’d have to admit it’s not the best but I think it’s pretty okay considering that I didn’t have a lot of winter-apt stuff, I barely could fit any of my old clothes and we were chasing good lighting a.k.a Mr. Sun.

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So here’s what I came up with: my DIY Flower crown from years ago, Tassel earrings on sale at Walmart for $2, my thrifted fur find from a garage sale in 2007, a plain white tank top that barely fits me, a knitted sweater I thrifted from Goodwill, a tulle maxi skirt from the Philippines that doesn’t fit me at all. (unzipped skirt clearly not in photos,haha) and Zara nude flats that I risked in the snow (btw, they survived).

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…And we were lucky enough to have light snowfall while we were taking pictures.

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I’m sharing some of my raw and unedited photos just to continuously remind myself how beautiful and wonderful pregnancy is no matter how ugly I feel inside and out and after I give birth I’m going to make sure that I wear my ‘battle scars’ (aka stretch marks) with pride.

They say the biggest blessings come in small packages, I guess this little one is an exception because this tummy of mine ain’t nothing like a small package. Haha. I can’t wait to meet you my little Xavi.

~Mommy Rhea